Color, 2008, 38m.
Directed by Bobby Hacker
Starring Travis Jones, Bobby Hacker, Richard Bain, Tyler Jones
Troma (DVD) (US R0 NTSC) / WS (1.78:1) (16:9) / DD2.0


Cars 3Boasting the most shameless title in recent memory, this Troma release has nothing to Cars 3do with the thuddingly lazy pair of Pixar films; instead, here's a semi-improvised, effects-filled slice of insanity that makes a strong bid at becoming your next regular party disc. Writer/director Bobby Hacker's film is essentially the third (and longest) installment in his Cars series, which kicked off in 2007 and introduced the character of a screaming, semi-demonic Funtown Auto used car salesman (Jones) engaging in yelling matches with his auto financing/nunchuck-wielding son, Timothy (Hacker).

Here we have something resembling a narrative as it turns out the previous videos were stunt ads created to drum up business for the flailing business, which was ultimately saved a combination of a tie-in rock group and a visit from Satan, who offers a one-year lease on the soul of our nameless salesman as long as he sells a particular 1986 Mercury Topaz without using any occult powers. Now he only has one hour left to sell it and will "stop at nothing" to get it off his hands -- even if it means taking a chainsaw to uncooperative customers.

Of course, this is all basically an excuse for a lot of random insanity including a protracted gun battle, a music video, a guy in a furry alien costume, and a trip to the afterlife, not to mention a gonzo twist ending involving an interdimensional portal and a sentientCars 3 basketball. As the end credits proudly claim, this "was shot entirely without a script (in case you had a hard time putting that together)," which means you're best watching it after consuming a reasonable amount of alcohol and willing to go along wherever the random goofiness takes you. It's certainly never dull, Cars 3and at barely over half an hour, the energy never flags and the film takes a surprising number of twists and turns you're guaranteed to never experience anywhere else.

Extras include a raft of incredibly random and silly Hacker short films including "Jesus Sandals," "Bundo!," "Roy Orbison's Bird Shit Fetish" (exactly what you'd expect), a "Heart Shaped Hearts" music video, both previous Cars installments (each running a little over a minute), "Dear Jesus," "Dusty Desperados," and "Squaw Talk." All are very brief, with many of them continuing the faux commercial idea taken to outlandish extremes. Also present are the usual Tromatic extras, which means a bunch of trailers (Father's Day, Mr. Bricks, The Taint, etc.), the Radiation March, and Lloyd Kaufman's promo, "Make Your Own Damn Movie without a Crew."

Reviewed on June 26, 2013.